How to Talk to a Child About Divorce: By Age

Divorce is a conversation you fear more than the decision itself. You don't know how to say it without causing pain, so you put it off until the tension becomes obvious to everyone. An honest conversation, held at the right time and in a human way, is usually easier for children to handle than silence and guesswork.

What Matters Most to Say First

The first thing to communicate: the decision was made by the adults, and it has nothing to do with the child. Children almost always try divorce on for size — "if I had been better behaved, they wouldn't have split up."